M.I.S.S.I.N.G

There are many things I have been missing alot lately...

I miss my rabbit back in Miri...

I miss my family so much though I'm goin back this comin' thursday...

I miss my days when I was an athelete...

Those days were totally awsome...

i won medals by medals...

most of them were "GOLD"

arrRRggHH...!!!

I miss my sporty life!!

wish can go back to school...

i miss my dad..

i miss my days in KEM PRINCESS HALIZA, SEPANG...

I miss Mickey and Brownie...

I miss hanging around with my fwens in mIri...

I miss my backyard...

I miss driving mom's car without she knowin' it..

i miss chillin' around with my kazens...

i miss skateboarding...

i miss swimming...

i miss! i miss! i miss!!!!!

aduuuuuhhh.....!

seriously I miss everything!

~xoxoxoxo~

You Told Me in A Dream You Always Loved Me....

You told me in a dream you always loved me.

I wept with joy at what with joy you said.

My sadness was not there.

It was so lovely.

And with you was my darling, also dead.

The sky was with an early sunrise burning,

Yet still with ample darkness for the moon,

Which held the secret of its youthful yearning

Although it knew that it would vanish soon.

How wonderful, I thought, at last to hear you

Say what I had known but never heard!

Abandoned, I have long longed to be near you

And find my long-lost refuge in a word.

I saw the truth of it within your eyes

And blessed the dream that ends but never dies.

ps: HAPPY MOTHERS DAY MAMY...

"another day to go on with"

move on an keep on move on..
sometimes it is just so hard to face another day...
no wonder there were people who dare to commit suicide..
it makes me think..
why life must be so hard, so difficult, so challenging, so frustrating???
it makes other hate themselves more..
it makes people feel down of themselves when ever they're not strong..
i want to understand that...
i want changes in life..
my life, other people lifes....
strenght, love, courage and enthusiasm what create life to its' best..
when you say you love someone, how much does it exactly means to you???
till which level will you sacrifice for your loves one?
sometimes being selfish is also good when you know how to use it..
i live my life by bothering to care about others....
i care about how they feel what they want and what they need..
perhaps sometimes i wont be able to fulfill everything
but at least i am there to listen to every words they eager to tell others who willing to hear..
but i forgot that i never care anything about me...
but i am always fine with it as i have my dearest Jesus with me..*winking*
there are people who lost their loves one...
some of them still can survive without the person whom they love so much are no longer around...
but some are not...
i lost my dad when i was 17...
doctor said he was unable to survive because of heart attack...
3 years has passed by but i still feel his presence around me..
i can say that i am among those whom sometimes can be very stubborn to accept reality and facts cause those two words can be very heart-tearing...
i still cry even until now for losing my dad..
he's the best!
but i have to move on...
i hope other people are like me..
that's how life suppose to be..
we came in alone and with nothing to the earth...
and that is how we will leave it one day..
perhaps dady is watching over me...
i always pray that dady is with HIM up there...

p/s: "dear Lord, i pray that my dady's soul is rested in peace as he is joining Your kingdom for now and forever. give me strenght and wisefull thought as i am living in this world walking every steps i have. lead me dear Father, as i kneel on my knee and giving up all my body and soul to you Lord, let everything that will happen is as how You want it to be for me..."